Taking Care of Yourself
Taking Care of Yourself
- Alcohol and Other Drugs
- Eating Concerns
- Rape, Sexual Assault and Interpersonal Violence
- Self-Care Tips
- How to Help a Friend
- LGBTQ Resource Guide
- Understand the Individual Effects of a Disaster
Psychotherapy & Treatments
Understanding and Treating Anxiety
Are these just the Blues or Am I Depressed?
What are the typical signs and symptoms of depression?
- Persistent sad, irritable, anxious or empty mood
- Feelings of hopelessness, pessimism, guilt, or worthlessness
- Loss of interest or pleasure in ordinary activities
- Sleep disturbances (Insomnia or oversleeping)
- Eating disturbances (Increased or decreased appetite/weight)
- Decreased energy, fatigue, and feeling “slowed down”
- Thoughts of death or suicide; suicide attempts
- Increased restlessness and irritability
- Difficulty concentrating, remembering and making decisions
- Feeling completely alone or isolating yourself from others
How Psychotherapy and other Treatments can Help People Recover
- Whatever you are feeling is okay. All feelings are valid.
- Give yourself permission to cry. You do not have to appear strong.
- Some people find comfort through spiritual supports and practices.
- Shock and disbelief are common.
- Some reactions or feelings might be delayed. The reality of the loss might impact you later.
- It is common to think about other losses. One loss might cause one to reflect on other losses.
- It is common to feel anger; it is okay to be angry.
- Take care of yourself. It is okay to not follow your regular schedule.
Please link to the Office for Student Wellness here.
Local Alcohol Anonymous & Al-Anon Meetings*
|Sun @ 7:30 pm||Congregational Church, 207 Washington St.|
|Tue @ 12:00 pm||Top of the Hill||Friends Meeting House, 26 Benvenue St.*|
|Wed @ 8:00 pm||Congregational Church, 2 Central St.|
Wed @ 8:00 pm
|St. Andrew’s, 73 Denton Rd.*|
|OD||Thur @ 12:00 pm||Top of the Hill||Friends Meeting House, 26 Benvenue St.*|
|C12W||Thur @ 7–8:15 pm||Women’s||St. Andrew’s, 73 Denton Rd.*|
|OSD||Fri @ 7:30–8:45 pm||Fifth Chapter||
Congregational Church, 207 Washington St.
|CDW||Sat @ 10:30 am||Sober Sisters||St. Andrew’s, 73 Denton Rd.*
*within walking distance to Wellesley College
Alcohol Anonymous Meeting Codes
O = OPEN SPEAKER (public welcome)
OD = OPEN DISCUSSION
CD = CLOSED DISCUSSION
CS = CLOSED SPEAKER MEETING
SD = SPEAKER DISCUSSION
12 = 12 STEP MEETING
W = WOMEN
Wellesley Al-Anon Meetings:
|OS||Sun @ 7:00 pm||Friends Meeting House, 26 Benvenue St.*|
|OS||Tue @ 7:30 pm||St. Andrew’s Episcopal, 79 Denton Rd.*|
Al-Anon Meeting Codes:
D = Discussion Meeting - topics vary
S = Step Meeting - topics always one of the 12 Steps
Meetings are 1 ½ hours unless otherwise indicated.
- Loving Your Body
- Eating Disorder
- Eating & Body Image Resources
- Eating Disorders & the Holidays
- How to Help a Loved One
20 Ways to Loving Your Body
Compiled By: Margo Maine, PhD
- Think of your body as the vehicle to your dreams. Honor it. Respect it. Fuel it.
- Create a list of all the things your body lets you do. Read it and add to it often.
- Walk with your head held high, supported by pride and confidence in yourself as a person.
- Don’t let your weight or shape keep you from activities that you enjoy.
- Count your blessings, not your blemishes.
- Be your body’s friend and supporter, not its enemy.
- Put a sign on each of your mirrors saying, “I’m beautiful inside and out.”
- Search for the beauty in the world and in yourself.
- Consider that, “Life is too short to waste my time hating my body this way.”
Help for Eating Disorders
Treatment can help. Don't delay seeking help if you think you may have disordered eating.
Things to do Instead of Bingeing
- Brush your teeth; take a shower or bath.
- Soak binge food in water.
- Leave the environment that’s tempting you to binge. Go to a park, library, or other “safe place”.
The Gurze 2007 Eating Disorders Resource Catalogue; Page 6
Resources for Eating & Body Image Concerns
- Residence Life staff
- Student groups
- Mental Health Educators (MHE’s)
- Balance Health Educators (BHE’s)
How to Help a Loved One
6 Ways to Support Someone with an Eating Disorder during the Holidays
By Margarita Tartakovsky, MS
~ 2 min read
Here’s some insight from the experts at Eating Recovery Center that might help.
- Avoid being the food police. According to Bonnie Brennan, MA, LPC, clinical director of Eating Recovery Center’s Partial Hospitalization Program:
- Ask your loved one how you can help. According to Elizabeth Easton, PsyD, clinical director of child and adolescent services at Eating Recovery Center’s Behavioral Hospital for Children and Adolescents:
- Sexual Assault
- Sexual Misconduct/Title IX
- Sexual Violence Awareness & Education
- Self Care Through DeStressing
- Accepting Range of Emotions
- Understanding Trauma
What you Should know about Sexual Assault
If it is after our office hours and you are in need of immediate services, contact:
- Counseling Service After-Hours: 781-283-2839
- Health Service After-hours: 781-283-2810
- Campus Police: 781-283-5555
- The CD on duty by calling Campus Police 781-283-5555
- Boston Area Rape Crisis Center 24-hour Hotline: 800-841-8371
- Metro West Medical Center Emergency Room: 67 Union Street, Natick MA
- Newton-Wellesley Hospital Emergency Room: 2014 Washington Street, Newton MA
Sexual Assault is:
- Any sexual act committed or attempted against a person's will.
- Forced sexual contact by dates, spouses, family members, acquaintances or strangers.
- A range of acts, from obscene phone calls to forced sexual intercourse.
- Any sexual contact you don't want.
College Sexual Assault
- At least 1 in 4 college women will be the victim of a sexual assault during her academic career.
- On average, at least 50% of college students’ sexual assaults are associated with alcohol use.
- Sexual assault is a punishable crime in Massachusetts.
Sexual Misconduct/Title IX
Self Care Through DeStressing
Important signs of Stress:
- Muscle tension bracing habits
- Hyper-vigilant, aggressive over-reactivity
- Caring too much or too little
- Disrupted breathing patterns
- Cold, sweaty hands
- Negative self-talk
Strategies to cope with the Range of Emotions
- Response to Range of emotions, sometimes they are necessary
- Shift out of Emotions, when you can and they are not helping you
Making Sense of Appraising
Self Care Thought
Adapted from a Sports Worksheet
Workshop Led by: Amy Baltzell
Accepting Range of Emotions
Word/Phrase/Image of ACCEPTANCE
What one situation Can create aversive Emotions that you Cannot shake?
What is the typical Negative emotions?
Stress Reduction Strategies:
- Imagine you feeling and responding just the way you want to!
Engaged Practice: Practice SEEING and FEELING yourself respond the way you
- I emotionally feel _________________________.
- I focus on __________________________.
- I encourage myself, by thinking __________________________.
- This is important to me ____________________________.
- I see _____________________________________.
- I physically feel ____________________________ .
- Breath Control Practice
Relaxation Response Four elements underlying Relaxation Response:
- A quiet place
- Comfortable position
- Mental Devise
- A passive attitude
Adapted from a Sports Worksheet
Workshop Led by: Amy Baltzell
- Suicide Myths
- Suicide Intervention
- Helping Students Cope
- Risk Factors
- Signs of Distress
- The JED Foundation
- People who discuss suicide will not commit suicide
- Suicide occurs without warning – “out of the blue”
- Only a person from a certain socioeconomic status and ethnic background commits suicide
- The motives for suicide are easily established
- Everyone who commits suicide is depressed
- You have to be crazy to commit suicide
- Suicide is inherited
- Improvement in emotional state following a suicidal crisis means a lessened risk of suicide
- Thinking about suicide is rare
- Asking a person about suicide, especially a depressed person, will push him/her to die by suicide
- When someone talks to you about suicide, change the subject and try to get their mind off it
- People who attempt suicide by a low‐lethal means are not serious about killing themselves
- People who threaten suicide are only looking for attention
- If someone really wants to suicide, there’s nothing you can do about it
- People who talk about suicide are unwilling to seek help
- People who really want to die will find a way, so it won’t help to try to stop them
- Suicidal people clearly want to die
- Suicide occurs at great numbers around Christmas and Thanksgiving
- Most people who attempt suicide once can be expected to make multiple attempts
- Once a person attempts suicide, the pain and shame will keep them from trying again
- Most people who kill themselves usually have made multiple previous non‐lethal attempts
- Suicide is to be expected in cases of severe hardship
A. The ability to recognize a student in trouble.
B. The ability to actively intervene.
1. Characteristics of Student at Risk: (all require treatment and intervention)
A. Depression: some symptoms include
- Insomnia or sleeping excessively
- Changes in appetite and weight
- Depressed mood; crying spells
- Apathy or agitation; Anger
- Lack of joy and passion for life
- Feelings of hopelessness and/or helplessness
C. History of previous suicide attempt
D. Family history of suicide
E. Drug or alcohol abuse
F. Feeling that one is in trouble (legal, academic)
H. Suicidal intent or plan:
- passive - vague wishes to die - serious and needs professional treatment and intervention;
- actively planning - very serious, and requires immediate emergency intervention.
2. Intervention Flow Chart: (Jane is a fictitious student)
B. Remember that preservation of life takes priority over confidentiality.
J. Continue to consult with the appropriate professionals regarding any ongoing concerns.
L. Get support for yourself – don’t worry alone.
Helping Students Cope with Sudden Death - Robert Evans, Ed.D.
Risk Factors: Associated with an Increased occurrence of Suicidal Behavior
The list of risk and protective factors is neither a complete list nor prioritized in any order.
Clinical Core Competencies Curriculum
FINAL September 2006
Signs of Distress
- Sudden change in behavior
- Frequent absences from work or class
- Oversleeping, thus being repeatedly late
- Fatigue, lack of energy
- Appearing sad, malaise
- Appearing distressed or in despair
- Lack of concentration, focus
- Numerous mistakes in their work
- Memory lapses
- Teary – appearing vulnerable and fragile
- Anger-intense and out of character
- Disheveled appearance that is out of character
- Erratic behavior
- Changes in eating or sleeping patterns
- Increase in and/or excessive use of alcohol or other drugs
- When they tell you they are in distress
The JED Foundation
How to De-Stress and Take Care of Yourself
- Let others know that you are overloaded. If you don’t tell them, then they will not know.
- You might find that solitude and private time to meditate, reflect and/or pray is helpful.
- Take time to nurture yourself
- listen to music
- take a walk
- go to a yoga class
- exercise vigorously
- do a hobby or task that you find enjoyable
- see a good movie, alone or with a friend
- get your hair done or get a manicure/pedicure
- read a novel
- Talk about what you are feeling and/or experiencing with family, friends, and colleagues.
- Try not to isolate yourself.
- Spend quality time with those you love.
- Do a random act of kindness.
- It’s okay to turn off the news.
- Give yourself more time for daily routines.
- Let go of some things – reprioritize.
- It’s okay to give up a task or responsibility or to take a week or two off of duty.
- Be forgiving of yourself and others.
- Be kind to yourself.
- Call the Stone Center Counseling Service 781.283.2839 for support
Tips for Self-Care When Transitioning to College
- Reflect on what you did for self-care prior to coming to college.
- Make connections and maintain those connections.
- Try to keep a balanced schedule in which there is both work and play.
- Get sufficient sleep; eat a balanced diet three times a day; exercise.
- Find time for rest and relaxation.
- Get off campus at least a couple of times a month.
- Do not wait until the last minute to do work; put a study plan in place.
- If you cannot study in your room, find a more conducive place on campus.
- Illicit the support of a peer as a study partner.
- Try to go home for Thanksgiving, or devise an alternate plan to be with friends on or off campus.
- Do not overload yourself by being involved in too many extracurricular activities.
- Expect changes in yourself, i.e. ideas, values, interests, career goals.
- Keep in mind that this is a time of growth, self-knowledge and personal development.
- Try something new, explore, and take some risks, while maintaining your safety.
- Expand your knowledge base and areas of interests.
- Have fun, enjoy your friendships.
- Enjoy your college experience!
Tips & Tools for the Procrastinator
- Do you continuously put things off until the last minute?
- Do you gamble with time to see if you can complete tasks in increasing less amount of time?
- And, when you succeed do you have a feeling of ZEST!
- Is it getting harder to succeed at this game?
- Are you known by your family and friends as being a procrastinator?
- Have you been getting into more and more trouble due to your procrastination?
- Has it become painful for you?
This might help you:
- Admit to yourself that you have a problem.
- Make a decision to address the problem.
- Take responsibility.
- Let those close to you know that this is a problem and is painful for you.
- So, forgive yourself and let go of the self-blame and self-degradation.
- And, elicit the help of others, i.e. counseling, the PLTC.
Transitional Tips for Davis Scholars
- Remember that “It’s a New Day”!
- Mixed or conflicting feelings are common.
- There is so much to do….
- You planned carefully, but you cannot plan for what you do not know.
- Be kind to yourself…
- Some things “gotta” change. Reprioritize; give some things up.
- Relational shifts
- Find your niche
- Schedule in self-care
- Give time for reflection on the learning, both inside and outside the classroom
- Personal growth, identity shifts are inevitable – both expected and the unexpected
- Other – we are all unique and will have things unique to us, and that’s okay!
R. Cook-Nobles, 8/2016
Common Responses to Trauma and Coping Strategies
Patti Levin, LICSW, PsyD
© 1989, 2001, 2003, 2004 by Dr. Patti Levin
After a trauma, people may go through a wide range of normal responses.
- aches and pains like headaches, backaches, stomach aches
- sudden sweating and/or heart palpitations (fluttering)
- changes in sleep patterns, appetite, interest in sex
- constipation or diarrhea
- easily startled by noises or unexpected touch
- more susceptible to colds and illnesses
- increased use of alcohol or drugs and/or overeating
- shock and disbelief
- fear and/or anxiety
- grief, disorientation, denial
- hyper-alertness or hypervigilance
- irritability, restlessness, outbursts of anger or rage
- emotional swings -- like crying and then laughing
- worrying or ruminating -- intrusive thoughts of the trauma
- flashbacks -- feeling like the trauma is happening now
- feelings of helplessness, panic, feeling out of control
- increased need to control everyday experiences
- minimizing the experience
- attempts to avoid anything associated with trauma
- tendency to isolate oneself
- feelings of detachment
- concern over burdening others with problems
- emotional numbing or restricted range of feelings
- difficulty trusting and/or feelings of betrayal
- difficulty concentrating or remembering
- feelings of self-blame and/or survivor guilt
- diminished interest in everyday activities or depression
- unpleasant past memories resurfacing
- loss of a sense of order or fairness in the world; expectation of doom and fear of the future
Helpful Coping Strategies
- talk about the traumatic experience with empathic listeners
- hard exercise like jogging, aerobics, bicycling, walking
- relaxation exercise like yoga, stretching, massage
- prayer and/or meditation; listening to relaxing guided imagery; progressive deep muscle relaxation
- hot baths
- music and art
- maintain balanced diet and sleep cycle as much as possible
- avoid over-using stimulants like caffeine, sugar, or nicotine
- commitment to something personally meaningful and important every day
- hug those you love, pets included
- proactive responses toward personal and community safety -- organize or do something socially active
- write about your experience -- in detail, just for yourself or to share with others
Tips for Effective Listening
Office of Intercultural Education
Coordinator of LGBTQ Programs and Services
LGBTQ Student Groups:
blackOUT serves to create an inclusive and comfortable space for all students of African descent at Wellesley who identify as queer (LGBT*QIA) or questioning
Familia is a group for LGBT*QIA* & Questioning Latinas on Wellesley College's campus
Group for LGBTQ and questioning students of Asian descent
Support and community for students who identify as TGNC (transgender and gender nonconforming)
QTSAQ (Queer and Trans South-Asian Coalition)
Wildcards for students who identify as asexual and/or aromantic
Medical and mental health services
Peer Listening Line: (800) 399-PEER
LGBT Helpline: (888)340-4528
Medical and mental health services for ages 13-29
Understand the Individual Effects of a Disaster
- Everyone who sees or experiences a disaster is affected by it in some way.
- It is normal to feel anxious about your own safety and that of your family and close friends.
- Profound sadness, grief and anger are normal reactions to an abnormal event.
- Acknowledging your feelings helps you recover.
- Focusing on your strengths and abilities helps you heal.
- Accepting help from community programs and resources is healthy.
- Everyone has different needs and different ways of coping.
- It is common to want to strike back at people who have caused great pain.
Seek counseling if you or a family member are experiencing disaster-related stress.
Recognize Signs of Disaster-Related Stress
- Difficulty communicating thoughts.
- Difficulty sleeping.
- Difficulty maintaining balance in their lives.
- Low threshold of frustration.
- Increased use of drugs/alcohol.
- Limited attention span.
- Poor work performance.
- Headaches/stomach problems.
- Tunnel vision/muffled hearing.
- Colds or flu-like symptoms.
- Disorientation or confusion.
- Difficulty concentrating.
- Reluctance to leave home.
- Depression, sadness.
- Feelings of hopelessness.
- Mood-swings and easy bouts of crying.
- Overwhelming guilt and self-doubt.
- Fear of crowds, strangers, or being alone.
Talk with someone and seek professional help for disaster-related stress.
The following are ways to ease disaster-related stress:
- Seek help from professional counselors who deal with post-disaster stress.
- Spend time with family and friends.
- Participate in memorials.
- Use existing support groups of family, friends and religious institutions.
Recognize Risk Factors
- Loss/grief: This relates to the death or serious injury of family or friends.
Vulnerabilities in Children
Meeting the Child's Emotional Needs
- The event will happen again.
- Someone close to them will be killed or injured.
- They will be left alone or separated from the family.
Reassuring Children After a Disaster
Suggestions to help reassure children include the following:
- Personal contact is reassuring. Hug and touch your children.